Brianna Wu’s SyFy “Feature” Is The Year’s Best Comedy So Far

by · March 17, 2016

wucover56

I just watched Brianna Wu’s segment on The Internet Ruined My Life, which is an unintentionally hilarious new show on SyFy. I gotta say, it doesn’t disappoint. In fact, it may be the funniest thing I’ve seen all year. Just watching Wu trying to squeeze out some fake tears is worth the price of admission alone. And since I said to hell with cable a long time ago, the price for my admission was actually zero.

I’m pretty much immune to getting angry at this sort of thing anymore. I mean, how could you? It’s really, really funny. In fact, it’s probably even funnier than the SVU episode from last year. Wu was never in fear for her life. In fact, Wu saw it as a business opportunity and has milked this GamerGate thing for all it’s worth since the first day she jumped in. This episode heavily features Jace Connors and his insane trolling, but it doesn’t once mention that it was all a huge joke. If you were someone who knows nothing about all this, you might even believe it. Then again, her acting job is so bad that I think even a lot of normies will end up laughing at it just like I did.

If you haven’t seen it yet, here’s an unlisted YouTube video that will probably be taken down before long (the downside is the audio is quite low). Unfortunately, it hasn’t had a scene release yet, so this is pretty much the best you can do at this point. It’s only 12 minutes long, so crack a beer, sit back, and laugh your ass off. The internet certainly didn’t ruin Brianna Wu’s life, but it damn sure provided us all with some top-notch comedy at her expense.

Oh, and the actress they have playing Wu looks nothing like her. I do sympathize with the casting directors, though. It’s hard to find someone with such a deformed mug.

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TheRalph

Founder, Owner, & Editor-in-Chief of TheRalphRetort.com. Political fiend, gamer, & anti-bullshit.

  • Pintheshadows

    Ha. I still can’t believe this show actually exists. They could of put the money towards making something worthwhile. No wonder SyFy is circling the drain.

    • Maintenance Renegade

      This shit is going to be so painfully quaint, dated and embaressing even for filthy normies in just a few years.

      • fnd

        LMFAO

  • Lost Question

    i feel sorry for the actress, she’s nice to look at and she has to play a deranged, idiotic, narcissist who is not that attractive. but hey it’s a paycheck right.

    • Toastrider

      Reference trope ‘Money Dear Boy’. Actors and actresses gotta eat too.

  • GoosePolitics

    “Oh, and the actress they have playing Wu looks nothing like her. I do sympathize with the casting directors, though. It’s hard to find someone with such a deformed mug.”

    Tell that to Guillermo del Toro or Peter Jackson. They’d be able to pull off a convincing Brianna Wu with make-up and prosthetics no matter who they cast..

    • AbesolutZERO

      >Implying Internet Ruined my Life has the budget for that

    • KLLRFRST

      She’s already replaced her Twitter avatar with a picture of the actress. That is some high-grade delusion. On the plus side, at least anyone that visits her Twitter won’t be driven to stab their eyes out.

      • Minniejbyrnes4


        “my .friend’s mate Is getting 98$. HOURLY. on the internet.”….


        two days ago new Mc.Laren. F1 bought after earning 18,512$,,,this was my previous month’s paycheck ,and-a little over, 17k$ Last month ..3-5 h/r of work a days ..with extra open doors & weekly. paychecks.. it’s realy the easiest work I have ever Do.. I Joined This 7 months ago and now making over 87$, p/h.Learn. More right Hereoi!1127➤➤➤➤➤ http://GlobalSuperEmploymentVacanciesReportsHour/GetPaid/98$hourly…. .❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:::::oi!1127…….

        • Charles Lam

          And I’m just sitting at my job like derp

        • KLLRFRST

          You can make even more money by pretending that there is a secret cabal of gamers plotting to murder you and asking for Patreon donations! Get to it Amy!

      • Danlantic

        Wu already has expressed the delusion that s/he is one with other women because of shared medical problems. Thus s/he seems to think s/he menstruates.

    • Danlantic

      Justin Bieber looks like Brianna Wu. But he’s not an actor.

      I know, they should have called Matthew Gray Gubler. Y’know, he plays Dr. Spencer Reid, the squeaky voiced FBI nerd on Criminal Minds.

    • http://TheRalphRetort.com/ TheRalphRetort.com

      Good point, Goose. I was being too kind.

  • Jared

    #sobrave

    god this is awful. Badly needs a counter weight.

  • chris perez

    Didn’t syfy also give that dipshit Will Wheaton a show that lasted about 5 episodes? They really are getting desperate.

    • http://TheRalphRetort.com/ TheRalphRetort.com

      They probably made this show for about $20. Cheap programming.

  • MKFenris

    Did they literally cast a woman as Wu? Also SyFy what happened to you man? You used to make good crappy movies with easy to predict plots!

  • Maintenance Renegade

    Give it time, the inevitable “threatened feminist” episode of Black Mirror is going to blow the GG SVU episode out of the water in terms of pure cringe.

    • http://TheRalphRetort.com/ TheRalphRetort.com

      My body is ready.

  • Emil Åslund

    Yeah, it’s hard finding people looking like Wu, seeing how ghouls doesn’t exist.

  • KLLRFRST

    OMG, this is comedy gold. The crazy eyes, the insanity and paranoia, the whole “woe is me” act….this makes the SVU episode look like Shakespeare by comparison. And what the hell is up with her husband’s face? He makes Edward James Olmos look like a Covergirl model. Speaking of models, the woman portraying Wu can’t act. She was obviously picked because Wu thought she resembled her the most *snicker*

    I think the best part is when Wu goes on some stupid rant about SMB 2 and feminism. Bitch, kids don’t give a shit about gender politics, and stop pretending that you did then either. Most of us played as the princess because she had a long jump like Luigi, but was easier to control due to her floating decent. Her gender had fuck-all to do with it.

    But I shouldn’t have been surprised that Wu was going to use this as an opportunity to needlessly inject gender politics into video games where they don’t belong like a good little SJW. Nor was I shocked that this was going to be nothing more than a platform for her shit on GamerGate and make up shit to milk for attention and victim bucks.

    • Maintenance Renegade

      Seriously. When I was a kid I played as princess all the way through SMB2 because it was retard mode. When I re-explored the game seriously when I was 19 I shifted away from her because I didn’t need the crutch and I was alot more comfortable with making precise jumps and moving through the levels faster than a slug.

      Same thing with DKC2. When I was a kid I was apeshit for Dixie’s hover but when I got older and more experienced I shifted toward Diddy’s speed and pixel perfect movement.

      • https://twitter.com/YAMATO_English Yamato-san

        Hey, don’t diss the slow-jumpers. Maybe it’s easy mode when playing as them, but dammit, flying (or gliding, floating, etc.) in a platformer is awesome. This is why I will always love Tails in Sonic 3 (& Knuckles).

        Of course, in a platformer that lets you select characters, I prefer to just play through the levels multiple times using each character at least once. In fact, I think this was intended in the original Dokidoki Panic.

  • https://midskiller.org RayoGundead
  • Mr0303

    I find it hilarious that they used footage from the “What It Feels Like to Be a Gamergate Target” video that ABC news did – you know one of the top 10 most disliked videos on YouTube.

  • Paul

    Is the actress a cis woman?

  • EnglishGit

    Couldn’t they get Kevin Bacon to play Brianna, his face is a closer match?

    • Dave The Sandman

      I heard Toxie missed the casting call

  • Duce

    OMFG They used the tweets Brianna sent to herself. Top fucking kek.

  • Social Justice Whitey

    ,,,Wu thang man,,,

  • http://www.isothedragonking.deviantart.com Iso

    Gosh, the media / MSM will do anythign to suck up to these crazy Anti-GGers, won’t they? Pity the MSM won’t expose them for frauds (And even if they do, they make sure to say they were GGer’s and not antis cause meh politics.)

    • Toastrider

      It’s not so much ‘anti-GG’ as it is ‘the progressive narrative’. Don’t let yourself get lulled into thinking this is JUST about games.

      If you read up on some of the folks who’ve been fighting this, you’ll see this is a MULTIPLE front war. Cultural, political, personal. And because there’s so much invested in this war, the media will not ‘expose’ anyone unless the noise level becomes overwhelming — and even then, expect to see crawfishing and excuses out the wazoo.

      You’re not wrong, but don’t think for a second these contemptible vermin will settle for shitting all over games.

    • KLLRFRST

      I don’t think it’s about “the cause” so much as it’s about the clicks and the ratings. Outrage and scandals boost views, which in turn jacks up ad revenue.

  • USKensington

    Did they cast a man or a woman as Wu? And how did they decide?

  • Doge

    Sup with the skull dude? You should sue, they are clearly trying to impersonate you.

    • http://TheRalphRetort.com/ TheRalphRetort.com

      My lawyers are looking into it as we speak.

      • Doge

        Gorilla gonna rustle the jimmies

  • BoredbyMSM

    “Oh, and the actress they have playing Wu looks nothing like her”

    Of course she doesn’t, I knew that the moment you specified it was an ACTRESS playing John Flynt, aka Brianna Wu.

  • Silence Dogood

    I’m glad I don’t get SyFy anymore. “The Internet Ruined My Life” ? Um, no. Your poor fucking decisions “ruined” your life. And it’s not true in Wu’s case since she’s raking in the now diminishing victim bux and has always had a healthy supply of cash. What a fucking joke.

    • KLLRFRST

      Yeah, her victim bucks income keeps shrinking. It used to be as high as $3500 a month (It hit $13,000 once, but that was due to a one time donation of $10,000), and now it’s just a little over $2000.

      I wonder if this is going to get the Patreon donations flowing again?

  • GuitarAnthony

    ‘I’d rape you if I could’

    Dude, really? Someone doesn’t even have low standards. Sub standards. Cause, fuck, I wouldn’t wish hitting that grotesquerie on anyone.

  • Dave The Sandman

    Aw come on….. it aint just BatWu who has had the “reconstruction” makeover

    Frank Wu is apparently 20 years younger and a hell of a lot slimmer…as opposed to reality where he is an older looking fat greasy haired wife beating git.

    • Dave The Sandman

      As I was saying

  • Terry “Death to Equality” Xu

    LOL

    I’m pretty sure the internet propelled her to a level of fame completely disproportionate to her accomplishments

  • Randy Starkey

    This is the kind of crap-shows that Syfy replaced Defiance for??????……SMGDH

  • vr

    this show needs to nominated under the category of fiction

  • Kellen Joel

    That doesn’t look like Wu. She’s decent looking!

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