Lies, Damned Lies, & Autistics
So, I’ve been in the “news” recently and I felt it would be appropriate to come here and bang out a few hundred words, even in the midst of vacation time with my wife. Sometimes, it’s best to hear things directly from the horse’s mouth. Most of the people who talk trash about me could never actually face the amount of fire I take on an hourly basis, much less day in and day out. Still, I signed up for the slings and arrows. I do not expect sympathy for my situation, as I brought it onto myself in more ways than one.
I was always due to leave the day-to-day running of this site on June 26th. That’s when I am scheduled to be sentenced for the incident I got myself into last year. As part of my bond, I have been placed on a device called Soberlink. Basically, it’s a breathalyzer that I have to blow into 5 times a day (7 am, 11 am, 3 pm, 7 pm, and 11 pm). Not only does it record my blood alcohol level, it also sends in a picture of my face along with the precise coordinates of my location. I have continued to use this device daily and have not missed a test on it all month, or indeed since February. The idea that I am in hiding is not only a lie, it’s a damned lie.
I understand certain autistics are going to spread around whatever they want, but I speak only about the actual facts of the matter.
Late last month, I failed a test on the Soberlink device. That means that yes, I drank alcohol. This was a pretty big error on my part. I had a good stretch of sobriety, but the hardship of impending incarceration, along with my mother’s extremely ill health at the time (which I talked about a little bit) pushed my mind into excusing the act of imbibing. This is something any alcoholic and/or drug addict can well understand. There is always a voice in your head ready to make an excuse for you to get drunk or high. It never goes away, you simply, hopefully, learn to beat it back. But even after learning, you have to constantly be on guard against a slip-up. This is a battle you have to fight again and again until you are no longer breathing.
None of this is to make any excuses for my failure. I am the only one to blame, even with the circumstances I listed above. In fact, those circumstances should have caused me to be even more resolute when it comes to not drinking. Sadly, that’s not what happened.
Anyway, I talked to my Loudoun pretrial officer (she’s responsible for the Soberlink) about the slip the day it occurred, and again on June 1st around 11:00 am. I was told on the call (which I recorded) that I would be informed if there was any change in bail status because of this issue. As it turns out, later that afternoon there was an adjustment made, but I was not notified about it. The first time I heard any news was last night when someone linked me a Cucktaku in Action thread written by a hater, which itself ended up becoming an Ian Miles Cheong hit piece on Heat Street. I have taken and passed a drug test in Richmond since the change, talked to my pretrial officer here multiple times, tweeted my location publicly, etc. At no time was I notified of an issue with my bond and I am definitely not in hiding. I’m sitting in my bedroom with my wife right now.
Anything you read other than this statement is hyperbole, stretched truths, and in some cases, outright lies. I put myself in this entire situation, starting with the incident last summer. I repeatedly owned up to the mistakes I’ve made and I continue to do so with this post. I look forward to beginning the process of finally putting this whole episode behind me starting on Monday morning, when I will be in Loudoun, Virginia to start my sentence a bit earlier than expected.
Once again, I want to thank all the readers of this site, all the people who continue to stand by me, along with everyone who has sent me a message of encouragement over the last couple days, and over the last year. Your support means more than you will ever know.