TheRalphRetort.com

TechRaptor Smeared as Antisemitic By Zoe & the Cuck

I’ve been enjoying a relaxing evening watching Arrested Development re-runs, but the news never stops. If you’ve been following Twitter the last several hours, you can see that Zoe and Cuckmaster Jr. have been trying to paint TechRaptor as antisemitic. I’ve enjoyed the TechRaptor website...

BEAUTIFUL DAY: Anti-Gamer Forces Turn on Each Other

It’s been another spectacular day here at TheRalphRetort.com headquarters. I’ve spent the last three hours or so laughing my ass off at the slap-fight that’s broken out among the anti-gamer contingent on Twitter. Now, I’m watching UK politicians beat each other up. But I had...

Noted Developer American McGee Calls Out Anita Sarkeesian

I’m a couple hours late on this news because I was catching up a little bit on NJPW. But in case you missed it, noted developer American McGee (American McGee’s Alice) went off on Anita Sarkeesian’s bizarre video from the other day. He called the female...

Congresswoman Wastes Tax Dollars Meeting with Zoe & Cuckmaster Jr.

I Finally have my setup in place (asshole Walmart somehow came through), so let’s talk about Zoe Quinn and her meeting today with Congresswoman Katherine Clark (D-Mass). She didn’t come alone, of course. She had Cuckmaster Jr. in tow. For those of you unfamiliar with the...

Draiman Demands GamerGate Stand Up Against Trevor Noah

OK, it’s been a long day battling Walmart, but for once I will spare you the details here, since it pisses me off to even think about it. There’s someone else who’s pissed off today, though, and that’s Disturbed frontman David Draiman . He’s been a staunch...

April Fool’s Day News Jamboree

I’m not gonna do any April Fool’s Day jokes today. First off, I just did the fake retirement a few weeks ago. Second off, I’m too lazy to think of a gag that wouldn’t suck, so I’m not going to try. Instead, I’m going to...

Anita Sarkeesian

Anita’s Still Shoveling Crap

If you’ve been following this space, you know that I’m having monitor issues. I’m about to go pick up this Samsung Smart TV. I think that will do the trick. But I decided to sit down and write a short column before I left. Since...

HARD TIMES: Leigh Alexander’s Old Colleague Speaks Out

Sometimes this job is really fucking fun. Last night, someone tweeted some Alexa stats out. Generally, I montior these stats a little bit so I can get a gauge on how the site is doing. They fluxuate sometimes, and aren’t the be-all-end-all, but they’re usually...

Polygon Cleans House…Kuchera Out Too?

I turned RAW off early so I could bring you a couple stories real quick. I’ll have my thoughts on wrestling later on the sister site I’ve been neglecting. But before I get to that, I have this Poylgon piece, and an anonymous testimonial from...

Ellen Pao Deserves Scorn, Not Thanks

Hey guys, sorry that I’ve been away longer than I would have liked. Wrestlemania took up my time last night. Today, I’ve been fucking with the new monitor/TV that Newegg sent me. It looks great, but only in 1400×900 (1080p claim was a lie lol)....

SJWs Paint TotalBiscuit as Transphobic Over Censorship Disagreement

Another day another dollar, as they say. I’m getting ready for Wrestlemania tonight, as I explained in the opening of a column I’ve yet to post. So I won’t go on too long about that (read it later lol). Over on Twitter, the lunatic SJWs...

The Artist Formerly Known as Internet Aristocrat Returns as MisterMetokur

I’ve only gotten through about ten minutes of his new video, but I wanted to get the news out as quickly as possible. The Artist Formally Known as Internet Aristocrat has returned to the scene as MisterMetokur (YouTube). with a new video about the recent rad...

“Politically Incorrect” Pioneer Bill Maher Takes On Worthless PC Culture

Hello again loyal readers. It’s another lazy Saturday here at TheRalphRetort.com headquarters. I was going to have another post up this morning, but I got blazed and passed out instead. Fuck it. Like I said, it’s Saturday. Speaking of sleeping, when I woke up, I...

HIGHLIGHT REEL: Alex Lifschitz Get Blown Out By Cousin

There’s a story I wanted to talk about and highlight, in case some of you missed it. It concerns Cuckmaster Jr. Alex Lifschitz. He was recently quoted in an Ars Technica feature on his girlfriend, the notorious floozy Zoe Quinn. He had some choice comments about...

Catching Up With Janet Bloomfield

It’s been awhile since we heard from Janet Bloomfield. So, I figured I would let her catch you up on her work. She’s still banned from Twitter over some bullshit, unfortunately. I know her voice is very much missed on that platform. She’s on Facebook, though, so...

Lionhead Shamefully Apologizes for Sharing “Foaming Jugs” Art After SJW Barrage

Something pretty hilarious just happened over on Twitter. Well, it’s actually kind of sad and infuriating, but I can’t help but to laugh at the absurdity of it. Lionhead Studios (owned by Microsoft) shared a piece of game art with a busty young lady holding...