#NotAtMyTable Rolls to Hit... and Fumbles

#NotAtMyTable Rolls to Hit… and Fumbles

Written by Mattaconda

Once again, modern progressivism and social justice ruins everything. Those who pray at the shrine of feminism have targeted anything that has a whiff of fun about it: from video games to science-­fiction novels to heavy metal music – if people are enjoying something without thinking twice about identity politics, a shrieking social justice devotee will be there to tell them how their fun is ‘wrong’ and infringing upon safe spaces. Most of these endeavors have failed spectacularly, although the comic book industry – where social justice warriors managed an Invasion of the Bodysnatchers style takeover – remains a stern warning that these raving lunatics can indeed invade, infest, and destroy businesses and fracture fandoms in short order if there is no pushback from sensible fans of the product.

Now it seems the manic street preachers from the far left have turned their attention to tabletop role­-playing games via the #NotAtMyTable hashtag. What is #NotAtMyTable, you ask? Why, it’s the beginning of the progressive stack for Dungeons & Dragons!

rpg cucks1

Because, you know, having a ‘creed’ doesn’t have any religious or cult­-like overtones whatsoever, does it? Hey, if I take this oath, when do I get my sweet Nike shoes and cup of Kool-­Aid for my astral journey to the mothership?

I’ve been playing tabletop RPGs for a long time. I’m just old enough to remember the crusade against D&D from the religious right in the 80’s. The tabletop industry withstood a vicious, brutal smear campaign in the media thanks to hardline evangelicals convinced that middle-­school nerds sitting around a table rolling polyhedral dice on a Friday night were legitimately spilling blood on the parchment and summoning demons whilst playing Alice Cooper vinyl records backwards. If that sounds as dumb and hollow as “all video game players are cis white males threatening the lives of females in the gaming industry” that’s because it was just as dumb and hollow. The RPG industry survived though, and from this near­-death experience came a number of games high on creativity and punk rock ethos – games like Vampire: the Masquerade, Shadowrun, and Cyberpunk 2020 pushed the limit on taste once it became apparent the far right was only making itself look foolish in its PR war against tabletop games. Sex and violence and crude language were possible again, and many of the writers and creators of the era weren’t going to miss the opportunity to express themselves.

Unfortunately, these grace periods can’t last forever. The pendulum would only continue swinging farther to the left as the 90’s went on. I could almost envision something like #NotAtMyTable happening 15 years ago. Gender pronouns in RPG rulebooks were becoming more and more of an issue. The gravitas of those late 80’s/early 90’s RPGs became sanitized in favor of not offending anyone. Moderators on web forums dedicated to RPG talk began strip­mining their message boards with a greater emphasis placed on speech censorship over stamping out proper abuse.

For me, the watershed moment was when Wizards of the Coast brought Wil Wheaton on board to write guest editorials for their print magazines. Only a few years prior the writers of Dragon magazine were cracking jokes about what a shit actor he was in Star Trek: The Next Generation. Years later, with those writers either ostracized or replaced, Wil Wheaton was now welcomed into the fold as an unelected ‘voice’ of nerd culture. There was nothing openly preachy about Wheaton’s editorials back then – they were mostly generic and vanilla takes on gamer culture – but there was always an undercurrent of progressive whining in between the lines. I recall one issue of Dungeon magazine where Wil bemoaned not having enough time (because he’s such a famous, in­-demand actor, you know) to find and play a D&D adventure suitable enough for his young stepson. No, that’s not a misprint. Wil was publicly telling people to never speak to him or his wife’s son again long before today’s meme was an itch in his daddy’s pants. Wil Wheaton is Cuckold Prime.

Turns out Wil moved on from writing columns for Wizards of the Coast because he didn’t play that much D&D in real life. What a shock! SJWs don’t actually partake in the hobbies they’re trying to ‘save’? Never would have guessed. Now, I’m not directly blaming Wil Wheaton for #NotAtMyTable springing into existence over a decade after he wrote some crap articles for now- defunct magazines, but it’s his brand of limp mewling coupled with more and more Tumblrinas filtering into the hobby and occupying forums and the RPG blog­-sphere that started this slow rot in role­playing games. What we’re seeing in quadrants of RPG fandom today is but a hint of the festering disease within.

Take a look at a few early examples from the #NotAtMyTable hashtag:

rpg cucks2

rpg cucks3

Do you notice anything about the individuals featured here? See if you can spot it. That’s right. Fat, white, goonybearded metrosexual losers self­-flagellating themselves because of their skin color and gender.

The premise behind #NotAtMyTable is absurd. 99% of the time you are partaking in a role­playing game with your real ­life friends and acquaintances. It is a time­ consuming and intimate social activity, not unlike playing cards or a board game with a group of people for hours on end. If there is a real example of hatred or bigotry or sexism occurring at your own table, guess what? You probably need better friends.

What about con games, you ask? Well, those are not ‘your’ table, even if you’re the individual running the game as the GM. Those tables belong to the convention, which always has its own set of rules and regulations that all guests are intended to abide by. If someone is being a real ­life asshole and legitimately threatening other players during a game, they’re going to get kicked out of the room, if not the entire convention. Saying that you’re against assholes disrupting your game is not really worth starting a hashtag movement over, is it? Isn’t everyone by default against a dickhead disrupting their fun?

Loudly proclaiming that you’re against racism or whatever ‘ism’ at your game table is nothing more than virtue signaling. You’re telling the world what a great person you are for imaginary brownie points from the regressive left. Or maybe you’re just trying to impress some sweet blue haired m’lady after the other seven guys ahead of you are done with her?

There is a secondary reason for the #NotAtMyTable hashtag existing though – it’s because SJWs are some of the biggest control freaks on the planet and it drives them insane to know there might be people out there in the wild who aren’t playing these games the ‘right way’. A progressive dingbat like Amber Scott (recently at the heart of the Beamdog/Baldur’s Gate controversy for her amazingly one-­dimensional and offensive portrayal of trans characters) can wedge as many themes of equality or feminism into the Pathfinder RPG materials she’s written as she likes, but Amber and her ilk have absolutely zero control over how I choose to run that adventure at my own table. It’s called DM-­fiat. At my own table, I have the ability to distort, change, rewrite, or ignore anything I want from a published game product for the betterment of my own group’s game. Does any of that ethos sound familiar? Yeah? That’s because it’s basically what social justice morons attempt to do to every other medium they get their hands on. (“Hurr! Samus is trans now because I said so!”) Getting a taste of their own medicine is a horror show for these people. It keeps them awake at night to think you might be sitting around your own table in your own home with your own friends and have the time of your lives without once broaching the topic of inequality between halflings and half­-orcs.

These idiots want to police you and your behavior. Luckily, more than a few brave souls passed their resistance checks and started the fight back:


(A censor-­free #NotAtMyTable discussion also exists at:


Nora Ralph

Student, worker, and Co-Founder of the #Killstream. You can also catch me on TheRalphretort Rundown.

  • Doge
    • Silence Dogood

      Ah, Satan. He always could be called on when you needed to roll that “natural” 20. I’ve got more leans on my soul than a black single mother with 4 baby daddy’s has on her crack house. Oh, dear, was that insensitive and slightly racist? >_> I can never tell without SJWs/Feminists around to remind me to check my privilege!

    • Bradford C. Walker

      One of the folks in that pic? Stephan Lea Shepard, who turned into a SJW cultist that mods at the SJW Cult Compound that is RPG Net.

      • Doge

        Yes, I believe so. ew I feel dirty now.
        The image comes from the last ep of Freaks And Geeks

  • Doge

    I know what you mean about gender pronouns in manuals…
    The game ‘Dead of Winter’ swaps up the pronoun about every 3rd page. It’s just like pick one already you fucks and stop pandering. Or if you wish to continue being so retarded about it just say “THE PLAYER”

    • Silence Dogood

      I thought Dead of Winter used “she/her” more than “he/him”. Or maybe that was Vampire: Prince of the City (older title)? It seems like it’s better to write in the “female voice” simply to avoid busy bodies freaking the fuck out over perceived “muhsoggyknees” (never mind the fact that using the female voice excludes the male voice… something something sjw/feminist double standards).

      • Typical

        Every pathfinder book is all female pronouns. I don’t care except how obviously pandering it is.

        • Silence Dogood

          I heard pathfinder had some very blatantly ideologically motivated people working on it; namely that one bitch who decided to make a 1 dimensional trans character and simultaneously mock GamerGate (for which she paid quick dearly I believe).

          • Maintenance Renegade

            No that was something else, I guess some company is still releasing expansions for Baldur’s Gate for some reason and that’s where that nonsense went down.

            Injecting that nonsense into either setting is absurd in any case, we’re talking about a world where you can pop over to your city’s local wizard and pay him a few weeks wages for a flask of magic potion that’ll instantly turn you into a healthy fully functional girl if that’s what you so desire. The whole “trans” difficulty/conflict can’t really exist in a world where such things are a reality.

            In fact as I recall it’s hardly unheard of in that universe for a magic user to turn a man into a woman and say “it’s just a prank bro!” when that individual then starts chasing him around trying to kick his ass.

            These are worlds where people go to weekend seminars where they learn how to transform themselves into tigers for fun and profit.

          • Silence Dogood

            Yeah and I remember things like a cursed girdle that caused the player’s gender to swap, which had certain benefits and drawbacks. Fantasy is all about having fun and these fucking special snowflakes just want to control other people in a “space” that should be completely free of their repressive influence. It’s the essence of thought policing.

          • Maintenance Renegade

            I can see them easily seizing control of alot of the organized events regarding tabletop RPGs but those events were already about as popular as cancer. As the article points out the ultimate tone and direction of each group out there is going to be dictated by the makeup of that group.

            I had some really atrocious SJWs in my own group before I knew what SJWs were, after responding to their foolishness with dumbfounded stares and confused head-scratching a number of times and refusing to capitulate to their insane whinging both of them ultimately fucked the hell off after one became super triggered about only males being able to bond with Astartes gene-seed.

          • GodBowser

            Since you mentioned the mighty Adeptus Astartes will the SJW’s go after Games Workshop and start demanding that they make Femstartes

          • Maintenance Renegade

            They’ve tried a few test bites but overwhelmingly the fan community surrounding 40k just resolutely tells them to fuck off each time. I think it helps that with the channer associations and whatnot there’s a high degree of awareness in the 40k community as to what SJWs are. how they work and how to beat them.

            We may have a better chance at taking over tumblr than they have of taking over the 40k community.

          • GodBowser

            Did they happen to try for female Primarchs too?

            Sounds like the 40K crowd could be a beacon of hope in the fight against the SJW’s

            Emperor protect us

          • Silence Dogood

            LMAO triggered by fantasy. Love it. #LifeIsNotFair #FantasyIsSubjective

      • Maintenance Renegade

        Friends tried to get me into Shadowrun recently, didn’t like the system and I think the setting is kind of dated and stupid to and that it tries to do and be too much shit at once. That straw that broke the camel’s back though were those latest edition source books we were working out of and the apparent identity politics in the constantly flip flopping pronouns.

        Any given shadowrunner is already way too much of a special fucking snowflake, if they all start identifying as things ontop of that it’ll really be a mess.

    • AbesolutZERO

      I really don’t give a shit which of the two pronouns a splatbook uses. I really couldn’t. I draw the line at xe/xir/etc.

      • Maintenance Renegade

        But without xe/xir/etc how would we refer to gender fluid deities like Slaanesh?

        • AbesolutZERO

          It! They! He or she. Whatever the fuck Slaanesh coalesces into at that given moment.

  • Silence Dogood

    SJWs/Feminists biggest success (body count) to date is the Atheism+ and now Humanism+ (yes, it’s officially a thing now) movements successfully censoring and fracturing the atheist/humanist/skeptic community. Of course one can always “no true scotsman” up an argument that the people who were anti-religion (and now prohibit people from mocking religion… dafuq is the point then?) and joined the SJW/Feminist cult got into the movement in the first place because they saw religion as “oppressive” rather than as intellectually offensive horse shit. Basically hipsters, when you think about it; shallow, useless fucks who don’t have their own identity because of a terrifying fear of being inadequate so they latch onto another, popular identity and slowly corrupt it.

    • Dranka Dranka

      Huh I always thought atheism+ meant aggresively anti religion (especially anti islam) atheism a la Hitchens. As in not only is religion erroneous it causes problems. Now that I think about it that was new atheism. Usually can kinda infer what these things are (never had to google “alt right”)

      • Dave The Sandman

        ” I always thought atheism+ meant aggresively anti religion (especially anti islam) atheism”
        Nah mate, but I can see where the confusion slips in.
        Positive Atheism is the position that there definitely are no gods. Richard Dawkins, being a scientist, says he can only be 99.9% sure (because it is impossible top prove there is no god scientifically), which in effect makes him an agnostic atheist. Most atheists fall into the agnostic atheist category. A postive atheist holds the position that that is just semanics, 99.9% is good enough, qed no god.
        Anti-thesim is the position that all religion is harmful to one degree or another, therefore all religion must be fought against. Hitchens was an anti-theist. Secularists drift twoards anti-theism, but most are happy to accomodate religion as long as they have no influence on society in terms of laws etc.
        Atheism+ was a SJW shitshow started by a pack of SJWs and beta orbiters that caused a major schism in the new atheist movement, crippled it for a while, then separated itself off to sit in its bile pit and fester, occasionally lobbing slanders and shite at the mainstream atheism movement. Its all but a dead faction now, as they turned on each other like rabid rats once the mainstream atheist community did its best to ostracise them. They still have their claws in in some places, but they are fading fast.

      • Silence Dogood

        “New Atheism” is a buzzword created by Atheism+ fags to create an out group of people who don’t share their ideology. There are only legitimate atheists and Atheism+ SJW/Feminist retards. Atheism+ forbids people to mock religion and places feels above reals and claims that white people, especially men, need to shut the fuck up and keep their heads down as their only purpose is to “empower and amplify” the voices of “marginalized people” such as PoC and women (especially black women since they rank so highly on the progressive stack).

    • Emil Åslund

      I’ve noticed that there are more atheists than religious joining the neo-feminist/SJW cult. Funny how they’re atheists when it comes to god and conventional religions, but they’ve become religious themselves thanks to the sheer amount of cult behavoir.

      • Silence Dogood

        Legit atheists who aren’t obsessed with identity politics are the silent majority. They basically just don’t have time for the bullshit and walked away from that “community.” The Atheism+ crowd were always social justice cultists, they just got into the culture of atheism because they viewed religion through their Marxist lens of “oppressor/oppressed” and saw religion as the ultimate oppressor. In reality, a rationalist, your “true” atheist (no true scotsman aside) rejects religion because it is unfalsifiable at it’s core and the measurable claims it has made have all turned out to be false. Basically the people who turned out to be a cancer were already a cancer from the start.

  • Silence Dogood

    …So you can’t role play an evil character who has racism, sexist or any other kind of negative personality trait/flaw as part of their character? Dafuq? I love how self righteous that bullshit is. Just for that I want to sneak into all their games and use my high charisma to seduce every female (and male) character we encounter (or fuck it, I’ll just use the Charm spell) and have sex with them, which, since I’m manipulating them, obviously means there’s no consent. Can you say #TRIGGERED?

    • Col. Mustard

      They are backpeddling hard and saying their stupid hashtag doesn’t reflect things happening to the story in-game and that they were only referring to stuff happening irl around the table – but only a schmuck falls for that line. Once you give SJWs an inch they will never stop taking. Give in to them here and the next edition of D&D will have 50 different types of otherkin as the playable races and xir and xe prounouns all over the place.

      • Already happened. Check out the D&D 5th ed. splatbooks.

        • Black Mountain Radio

          Which spalt do you mean? I only have the core books but I found them to be without SJ shit. Even the succubus/incubus entry seemed ok.

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      • Boris Fett

        I assume it was a given that its only referring to things that occurred around the table. That’s what I assumed from the start.

        But the problem with these sorts of virtue-signalling egomaniacs is that everything and anything can be construed as offensive by them. So you just end up sanitising everything.

      • Silence Dogood

        Precisely. They were once again advocating for ThoughtCrime and building a straw man so they could shamelessly virtue signal. The reality is an evil character at one of these special snowflakes tables would trigger the fuck out of them. I knew people like that growing up and you know what the group did with them? We expelled them, because they were so clearly damaged and abnormal that there was no helping them and we certainly weren’t going to let them fuck up our fun.

    • Emil Åslund

      The SJWs are blackguards thinking they’re palasins.

      • Toastrider

        Blackguards are typically more competent.

        • Emil Åslund

          Blackguards are cool as long as they know they’re blackguards. Look at Dorn Il-Khan, and I’m not even a fan for Baldur’s Gate EE.

  • ash

    #NotAtMyTable is more retarded SJW nonsense.

  • scemar

    If you don’t take a stand against them, it is only a matter of time until they come out for you.

    • Silence Dogood

      I don’t often say it, but the Jews were right (about that one).

  • tz1

    #ElfPrivilege. #OrcOppression #AffirmativeAction4Goblins

    I’ll stop here. If I continue I will be up all night and this will grow to be several kilobytes.

    • #ElfLivesMatter (& the response #OrcLivesMatter) actually was a thing back in 2015.

    • Toastrider

      Won’t someone think of the kobolds?

  • Mr0303

    Well if anything this hashtag is an easy way to see who’s a shit DM.

  • Dranka Dranka

    A good way to tell which hashtag movements you should latch on to is to irl somberly intoning your tweet. “There is no room for cruelty at my table. *pause* Not. At. My. Table.” Say this while gathered round your table with your fellow wizards. Bask in the reaction.

  • Frozen Binary Studio

    “Isn’t everyone by default against a dickhead disrupting their fun?”

    What if said dickhead also happens to be me?

    • Toastrider

      /tg said it best. Don’t Be That Guy.

  • Typical

    Actually dropped out of a facebook group for pathfinder after about the 5th time this inclusiveness shit came up and people argued for hours over the hypothetical person they’d be playing with who’d be offended by normal banter among friends. No one I know plays with random strangers they might accidentally offend. You think if I ignore the shit about elves being aliens I can’t ignore your social justice horseshit?

    I don’t wan to play at your faggy tables losers. If you need a more codified set of etiquette besides the standard “don’t be a dickhead” rule, then your game is going to suck donkey ass.

  • Quanta T

    I wish I had found a way into dungeons and dragons when I was younger, it seems to have a lot of potential, I like the look of the White Wolf role-playing. When I got into video games they seem to do all the heavy lifting in regard to role-playing, so there doesn’t seem to be much point to getting into it now. Anyway, I was going to say that there shouldn’t be rules in regard to anything involving play or fantasy. Not in comedy, not in sex, or music, or video games, or D&D. Between consenting adults people should be free, one of the most crucial aspects of these things and the part of life they express, is one of emotional expression and they cannot function unless they are free.

    • Pansergrateng

      White Wolf is completely corrupted by SJW shit, sadly, with retarded pronouns and crap all over their recent stuff. Outside of Eclipse Phase, it’s probably the worst of the lot when it comes to SJW infiltration.

      • John Doe

        Vampires are to SJWs what candy is to children.

        White Wolf is just driving an unmarked, windowless van, now…

  • Dave The Sandman

    Great article LovelyN
    Been watching this slow creep and now it seems to have reached critical mass fuckwittery. Time for The Purge.

    • Col. Mustard

      (Psst. Nora didn’t write it.)

      • Dave The Sandman


        my bad

        great article Mattaconda…and cheers Colonel for the hint 😉

  • GodBowser

    Hold on let me get this straight… Pathfinder was written by an SJW?

    That might explain why members of my group don’t understand why I have no respect for Will the Shill Wheaton

    I don’t know about Gamer Gate supporters being ostracized from geek culture but I think that Will and the other members of Geek and Sundry should be ostracized from geek culture themselves

    • Toastrider

      Not really. PF’s real problem is that it’s not well balanced at all. Remember all the bitching about linear fighters, quadratic wizards? PF increased the issues dramatically. Some of the Paizo developers are also notorious for having mad-ons against certain classes, and instead of not dealing with those classes, they tend to get in and nerf the shit out of them.

      • Black Mountain Radio

        When compared to 3.5 I wouldn’t say that PF has a terrible wizard/fighter mismatch (that’s as bad). My favorite example of this is “Wall of Force” which is flat out immune to damage in D&D but in PF they gave it hit points. Yes, wizards can still fly, teleport, and craft magic items, but PF helps make a lot of mundanes more than just beatsticks.

  • horus752

    It’s the asshole white Knights who allow this to fester. I despise them more then the fucking feminists who start this shit

    • John Doe

      I have admired John Kovalic for many years, and I was sad to learn what a festering White Knight he is, from his newer comics over the last 8 years or so.

      The art and the humor are still good, but….

      • Bradford C. Walker

        He’s as disappointing in person.

  • Toastrider

    Sigh. This makes my head hurt.

    The groups I’ve been in, oddly enough, have been evenly spread gender wise — typically 60/40 or 50/50 male/female respectively. It actually became something of a running joke, and years back in a convention track (DragonCon, IIRC), one panel was discussing getting women into gaming. Our joke was ‘We’ve got plenty, want us to contribute a couple?’. Yes, we all thought it was funny too.

    That, and there’s something absurd about a girl complaining that she wants to be respected and treated as a person, when she’s cosplaying a sexy catgirl. Even the girls in our group were scratching their heads over that one.

    Maybe it helps that we’re all older players. We’ve known each other a long time. We can disagree, and butt heads, but it never gets in the way of the fun. We all have our quirks and peculiarities, but nobody takes things too seriously when the dice start to roll.

    This just feels like someone’s trying too hard. AGAIN. If you can behave like a halfway civilized person you’re probably not going to have these issues come up.

  • Pansergrateng

    SJW infiltration of tabletop games is definitely underway, but I don’t really see them getting very far.
    Okay, so they cucked MTG, but it only really affected card art and the novels no one sane ever reads anymore. The game is still in the same downward spiral of power creep and corrupt aftermarket shilling it’s been in for the last decades or so.

    White Wolf’s recent shit has been super cucked and Eclipse Phase is basically SJW propaganda for anarchist trans-everything bodyswapping lunacy, but these are just some games among many. And if you actually enjoy the mechanics or setting, nothing is stopping you from rewriting it to be free from SJW taint (EP game with glorious Jovian master race stumping degeneracy, anyone?). Pronouns and crap everywhere else like in DnD 5th can safely be ignored, or you can flip them the finger entirely and buy MYFAROG or CthulhuTech instead.

    Beyond some stuff like this, there’s just a lot of impotent noise, like the recent case with the attentionwhoring lunatic that claimed she’d been abused for years at some flgs and spewed her filth around in order to pressure Wyrd into giving her a job as a “female ambassador” or some kind of bullshit, and there’s the odd blog where SJW filth whine about 40k not being PC enough or something or other being rape somehow.

    That’s not to say everything is fine and we should ignore it, but seeing how tabletop is such a wide and diverse market already, and not nearly as high profile and profitable as videogames, it won’t be easy for the SJWs to get anywhere.

    • John Doe

      Yeah, I mean 20 years ago, Wellwisher was not only an awesome card with awesome art, but the joke was told and retold a hundred times and everyone laughed.

      Now? I’d get thrown out of a FLGS.

  • Wait, you want people to go to Endchan, a known honeypot?

  • CultofZoidberg

    Hopefully they stay away from Magic the Gathering, I just got back into taht.

  • Dranka Dranka

    “I almost wished myself to die so she could win the whole thing, but…….
    Be aggressive, B-E aggressive.” There’s no crying in D&D. Real women can hang. https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=http://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DV2XGp5ix8HE&ved=0ahUKEwjT7ZSo6ezMAhUWKlIKHXjHBXEQyCkIHTAA&usg=AFQjCNFwkOWoTTRHBMw-Ul0h07brsyJy5g&sig2=HsiZzrUHlt_0pb-0tV_k6Q.

  • John Doe

    This reminds me of how horribly SJW Britta Perry’s character was in the D&D episodes of Community…..

  • Matteh

    “It’s 2016, your D&D game must address the issue that female kobolds only drop 70cp loot for each 1sp a male kobold drops”

    I should do something like this in my next game, then flip it so that males are hidden away and can’t get work because it’s way cheaper to employ females as experience fodder and workers (And players only get 70% of the xp from killing said fodder. Oh wait, attacking a female even in self defense is reprehensible and illegal too, so all male PCs will be hunted criminals.) That and male PCs having trouble getting quests because it’s cheaper to send female PCs off to kill dragons and stuff.