Last night, right before I fell asleep, someone sent me a link to “DJ Phil Fish.” I had no idea what this was, and assumed it was a joke. But, it was late, and I wasn’t doing shit, so I figured I would check it out. It turned out to be totally legitimate..and totally hilarious. But it was also a little sad, if I’m being honest. Fish is a guy who talked shit about gamers for years. “Suck my dick, choke on it…” that’s Phil Fish. The first time I ever heard of the bum, was because of some crazy shit he said.

Now, I’ll be the first to admit, I’ve gone on some Twitter tirades myself. But, that wasn’t Phil’s only problem. He’s also a staunch defender of the corrupt structures that threaten to destroy the video game industry. I wouldn’t care if he was just an asshole. That’s no great offense. But defending the crooks, and possibly taking part in the rigging of indie awards yourself? That cannot be tolerated.

(Hmmmm, need time to rig some awards, Phil?)

The only reason I haven’t written about him before, is because he has already been broken. Last night just confirmed that. Now he’s become the Double Fine court jester. They wheel out the stooge whenever they need a laugh. I’m sure it won’t just be Double Fine, either. His stooging ability is legendary, so he’ll get around.

Another person who is fast approaching legendary stooge status, is Kotaku’s Nathan Grayson. And, wouldn’t you know? He was also in attendance at this plush Double Fine blowout. They can’t afford to finish their fucking games, but they can damn sure throw a party? Did you pay for blow and strippers too, Tim Schafer? I have no doubt that your hypocrisy extends even further off-camera. If any participants would like to drop me a line about the festivities, contact me ([email protected]). I’d love to hear it.

I’m sure Stephen Totilo, and many other establishment figureheads, would no doubt say all this is fine. If this was the only thing we had, yea, it would be. Even though Phil Fish is a joke, the cozy relationship between all developers and the journalists who cover them isn’t. These journos are the ones who help decide winners and losers. As we’ve seen with Zoe Quinn, favorable press can make stars out of the completely undeserving. People like Nathan Grayson, Phil Fish, and Tim Schafer, conspire to allow it to happen.

Rats, roaches, and all other types of hypocritical vermin, hate the sunlight. Just like I usually say here in the close, we have to keep exposing them. They make it so easy, that it doesn’t really take much work. And the corruption they don’t just shove right out into your face, is starting to come out as well. People who would normally be sympathetic to these types, are now becoming turned off by their stunning arrogance. So, keep it up, Schafer. Drop that beat, Phil. Cruise for more indie ass, Grayson.

Because your time is almost up.



UPDATE: Wow, some of the shills on KotakuInAction are on red alert today. Thank you to all the cool people there, though!