A reader asked me something the other day on Ask.fm: “You suffer, but why?” Well, it’s a good question. I’ve been sort of cryptic about my problem, because it doesn’t involve just me. I wanted to be respectful of others who don’t care to live their lives out online. But, this is my site. Writing and getting feedback is one of the great joys in my life. So without getting too much into the weeds, I wanted to talk about things a little bit. This is not your regular type of column, so if you want to skip it, feel free.

Basically, someone that I held close for many years, quit on me. It happens to people everyday. Really, this is a First World Problem in a lot of respects. I still have something to eat, and a roof over my head. But anyone that has had this happen can tell you that it can feel worse than a death. So many of you believe in me. How can someone who I shared my innermost thoughts with for so long give up on me? My readers are mostly strangers, but they have more faith in me than this person does. It throws you for a loop.


My previous article talking about this brought in some amazing words and reactions. I’m still abiding by what I wrote there. Dulling the pain is not an option. Instead, I want to take that hurt and use it to fuel the fire. I realize that doing a post like this is kind of out of character, as was the last piece. But writing is what I do. I may start doing more life posts (and reviews, btw) in the style of Mike Cernovich to provide for a break from the SJW freaks who usually populate these pages. There won’t be too many, so don’t get worried. I’m not losing my edge. If anything, I’m sharpening my fucking blade…

Dwelling on the past will see your future get sunk. People move on. This thing we call life doesn’t always workout the way you had it planned in your head. But if you still have your health and an attitude that says “I will succeed no matter what” then you can do anything you want to do. There is always more time…until there isn’t. So get to work today. Don’t postpone things you wanted to do or say. Seize the day. That’s what I’m planning.

This is me putting a ribbon on my blue period. I felt like I needed to write something about it here. Maybe I didn’t, but I felt that way lol. This same person who threw in the towel said to me a few weeks back:

“Keep your site. That and #GamerGate are all you have left now.”

That’s not true, but even if it was, I would be a lucky man. The kindness and outreach that I’ve received from this community has warmed my heart, and will never be forgotten. You guys picked me up when I was low, and continue to do so. But that’s in the past now. I’m truly looking towards the future for the first time in a month (probably a lot longer, actually). All of you should do the same. Stop putting your life on hold, and do what you need to do to reach your potential…and your happiness.

Thank you all again for letting me get this off my chest, and for your support. I’ll be back tonight to throw some blows against the SJW menace. Until then, here’s a another message from one of my heroes, Richard Pryor:


  1. Well said. GG has brought people into my life that have greatly aided me. Perhaps not as largley as yours, but for the first time in ages, I feel like I am not alone with my convictions. With the internet and life being as it is, its amazing to know that there are people out there that actually may say “I agree”. SJWs try to make us feel like we are all alone and have nothing, so embrace their ideology. But they are simply wrong.

  2. I’ll say it again. We got your back, brah. There’s more than a few people I feel that way in GG. I’d like to think they’d have my back as well.

  3. Got your back miladdo, by which I mean the odd post in the comments section every now and again. It’s all good.

      1. Hey Ralph, don’t want to hijack, but I closed my twitter and dont’ feel like setting up anonymous email to talk at ya, but do you like how stephanopolous has to apologize for his defense and reporting on the clinton foundation after it’s disclosed he contributed $75 grand? This is why the normal media is smearing GG, they do the same thing and don’t want people looking too closely into how they do business.

        1. Buddy, you have no idea how right you are about this.

          It’s not just about games journalism. It’s not just about SJWs. It’s not even just about the MSM. There is something larger going on here, and GG is the only thing that has mobilized consumers / the public to figure out what that is.

          Watch for some new info in the coming days on the institutions who fund and influence games journalists, and who also fund and influence so-called gaming-focused “non-profits” like femfreq. It goes beyond a mere scam for money. Like your example, they’re shilling for someone and they don’t want us to know exactly who built them up and paid them.

  4. People come and go sometimes. It’s never easy to recover from that especially when the same person who goes is the one who you would least expect. To feel pain is human. No one can fault you for that. Takes a lot of courage to admit this but takes more strength to move forward. I hope ultimately you find that which makes you happy in the end.

    If it means anything I’d like to say thanks for giving us all an outlet. I know my stupidity probably has few places of comfort but I like this place and it’s people. Overall I like your brand of commentary and honesty and in return we will keep supporting you. If GG were to end tomorrow I’ll still come back for whatever wacky stuff is going on in the world.

    1. Thank you. This comment meant a lot. I hestiated to write another column like this, but fuck it lol. What the point in having an outlet if you can’t write about stuff like that sometimes. I appreciate your loyalty to the site, and there’s no need to thank me. I love the community here, and feel like it’s by far the best part of the site.

  5. Chin up, puff your chest and face the life head on. You’re tougher than destiny: you make it and bend it.

    Just keep on keeping on Ralph.

  6. “Keep your site. That and #GamerGate are all you have left now.”

    They’re your two biggest resources, use them to build back up.

    For insistence, you’re repeatedly published works by other people about gaming & GamerGate. You should probably have an open application process for that.

    1. Yea, I need to do better than just throw out the email address sometimes lol. I’ll work on that. I agree with you, though. The site and the awesome community are my two biggest resources.

  7. “We must accept finite disappointment, but we must never lose infinite hope.”

    – Martin Luther King Jr.

  8. You dont make the best steel by being nice to it mate. You shove it in a furnace and heat it up to red hot, then hammer the shite out of it. Then you do that again and again. Life is the furnace, people are the hammers.

  9. Ralph be the best Ralph you can be,work out,loose weight and learn how to cook/eat healthy (be good for yourself)
    She NEVER will come back no mater what you change or do so dont even try (and if she does, its for the wrong reasons)
    Make sure she is out of your life and stay’s out of your life
    Remember the good things and forget the bad things (on day you find that you did not think of her that day,month or year)

    Make sure you that you do things you are proud of and do them for yourself so wen you look in the mirror you see someone you are proud of

    1. Thanks man. I’ve lost 26 pounds or so since all this, and plan to lose a lot more. You’re of course right about everything you said here, although that’s a tough lesson to learn sometimes.

  10. loss and betrayal are probably the hardest things we face in this life… we become accustomed to and even feel entitled to things to which we have held for so long… only to have them snatched away in an instant… but alas here we are the sun rises again and shines on this beautiful crazy floating rock we claim as our own… the world is what you make it young man… and always ALWAYS remember it can get worse…

  11. ,,,everything passes,,,not without leavin a scar sometimes, or an invisible bruise on th’ inside of yer skull…what remains is who you really are,,,what’s left is what stares back at you in th’ mirror,,,you gotta look yerself right in th’ eye and say,,,”ok. Everything will be ok. Now. And for as long as i draw breath and not flies. Its all ok.” Then go make ok better…be well old buddy,,,

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