Zoe Quinn's Carnival of Lies Continues With Response to Milo & Me

Zoe Quinn’s Carnival of Lies Continues With Response to Milo & Me

I’m feeling bad that I used Zoe Quinn’s name in three straight headlines now. She wasn’t even featured in the first one very heavily, but I threw her in anyway. That ole tabloid spirit, I guess. Then again, I wasn’t expecting her to directly respond to my court dox column. I guess I should have, though, since she’s trashed me before. She really seems to hate me, which I have to admit, makes me smile. FDR summed up my feelings on the matter with this quote: “They are unanimous in their hate for me–and I welcome their hatred.”

One other reason I don’t feel bad about headlining it, is because Zoe Quinn isn’t actually her name. I respect whatever someone wants to be called, but as you saw from the court dox (and probably already knew), her real name is Chelsea van Valkenburg. Changing your name in and of itself isn’t a crime (Hi, Milo!), but when you combine it with all the other lies? It at appears a little shady. I’m not sure how much they charge to change your name in Massachusetts, but I’m sure Alex’s rich daddy could pay it off while you two jet around Europe.

On to what the Queen of Lies actually wrote in her egomaniacal response piece:

“I keep saying the phrase “August Never Ends”. I’m still being threatened over a review that never existed, still being hunted by the crusaders for “ethics” who will spin on a dime to defend child pornography but attempt to burn you in effigy for a poor taste joke made over 10 years ago. That’s nothing new. But there’s a fun new way to be ground down by all this thrown in the mix that I haven’t said much about.

The legal system.”

First off, I know you disingenuous bastards always love to throw out the “no-review” talking point, but it’s total nonsense. There was a rumor for a couple hours that there had been a review, and some people ran with it. Anyone in GamerGate who followed closely at all, knows there was no actual review. But another thing we know is, Nathan Grayson was hot for you for years. He also promo’d your game on Rock, Paper, Shotgun, highlighting it out of FIFTY other new Steam releases. Your game sucks ass, so this is piques the interest of anyone with half a brain. You remember young Nathan, right? He’s the one who lied about working on Depression Quest, among other things. But Kotaku sees fit to keep him on staff, regardless (That’s another story for another day).


So, what’s Ms. Quinn’s excuse for lying about Milo on the police report? I’m sure she’ll come right out, and own up to her mistake:

I see. The lies are now the fault of the police officer. I’m sure the fine public servants at the Boston PD will enjoy having their competence called into question. I’d love to be a fly on the wall for that discussion. I’m just guessing here, but I don’t think they’re going to take that one too well (EDIT: As noted to me on Twitter, she makes almost the exact same claim in court: that Eron Gjoni’s appearance on a livestream somehow motivated people to send her rape and death threats).

She spends much of the column crying to people to “please talk” about her “abuse.” I must be missing something, because the skank has been been featured in countless articles, features, interviews, panels, hugboxes, videos, supportive tweets…you name it, she’s been on it or in it. I guess that’s her life’s motto, now that I think of it. But, I digress.

Zoe also saw the opportunity to lie about her current predicament by repeating the fiction that she’s “on the run” in Europe. As it turns out, she had this trip planned before GamerGate even started.

“Keep in mind that I’m also writing this about 3,000 miles from the home it’s no longer safe to be at while we try and figure out how to move on from this meteor hitting us and be people again. I miss sleeping in my own bed, having my own space. I miss my cat.”



So, we have a person who lies about everything, all the time, whining for 3,000 words about how mistreated she’s been, while simultaneously sipping champagne in Europe, and raking in $4,000 a month for doing nothing. Excuse me if I don’t shed too many tears, Zoe Quinn, Chelsea, or whatever the fuck your name is. I’m gonna keep calling you out. I couldn’t even begin to describe how proud I feel to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with people like Milo Yiannopoulos. We’re just getting started. You will be fully exposed for the fraudulent phony that you are, by the time all this is over. Count on it.


I’m also considering take a flight up to Boston soon. I’ll do it if I have to, in order to get the rest of the story. I wish it was later in the year, though, so I could go see the Red Sox. As a Lakers fan, I wouldn’t been to keen on taking in a Celtics game lol.

Ethan Ralph

Founder, Owner, & Editor-in-Chief of TheRalphRetort.com. Political fiend, gamer, & anti-bullshit.